I was never a fan of Prince Charles and now that he’s King Charles (the Thurd) even less so. I have always blamed him for the death of Princess Diana. Based on what evidence or proof? Nothing more than a hunch. See, I look at him and I see a closet freak — a freak too freaky for a class act like Diana. She was hot. He was not. And he knew he had no business being with Her Royal Hotness. She was way out of his league. And she knew things. Things that could humiliate him in front of the entire Kingdom.
Besides, it’s obvious he had a boner for Camilla The Nosepicker. She looks like a fucking freak too; a sexual hawg. I think, between them, they shared some freaky sex stuff; stuff that would otherwise make Diana uncomfortable. Whether it was boogers or butt stuff, or not, I don’t know, but looking at King Charles, he just looks to me like a guy just begging to raise his kilt and get pegged. And I don’t think that was Diana’s bag. She didn’t strike me as the pegging type. Camilla, however, I could see her taking command and riding his ass like a Windsor Grey all the way to Fuckingham Palace.
All that said, I think that’s why he had Diana whacked — out of fear of her spilling the beans on whatever weird, fucked-up perversions he has despite the fact that none of us would even care. It’s all about vanity with these people. Hopefully, however, one day he’ll nut up to it and write a book about “How to Kill Your Wife” like O.J. did — and with just as clever a title like, “If I Kilt Her”.
In other news, a new official portrait of King Charles III was unveiled this week that appears to be smeared in the period- and sphincter blood of all the peoples the British Empire has raped and sodomized in their efforts to colonize (root word: “colon”) the world over the past 400 years. Artist Jonathan Yeo appears to be a huge fan of Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back, opting for a Han Solo in Carbonite motif featuring King Chuck in his fancy Welsh Guard cosplay costume holding his lengthy “sword” for the whole Kingdom to suck on.
Oh, and there’s a butterfly on his shoulder, too. It’s kind of an inside joke about him being a closet homo.
— MM
Contributing (Pr)Editor
Mike “The Meat Man” collects SSD and sits around all day browsing Seeking Arrangement for hot, young, college chicks to fuck for $100 a pop (cheap fucker) and then shares his adventures with us for free.
