Relationship Hack: How to Get Laid More

Here’s a fun, little relationship hack that will ensure you both get laid more AND lots of shit gets done around the house with zero huffing and puffing and lots of stuffing — of the pussy, that is.

GUYS: Between now and her next birthday, every time you get laid put $1 in a jar — let her know that whatever is in the jar by her birthday is what you’ll spend on her birthday present. (This could work equally as well with Valentine’s Day, too.) For her, it means the difference between going to Jared on her birthday …or going to Dollar Tree.

GIRLS: Get your own jar. On little pieces of paper write down all the shit that needs to get done, fold them and put them in the jar. Every time he wants to get laid, he has to pull one thing from the jar and do it first. For him, it’s simply the difference between getting laid and not getting laid. We only think with the most stubborn of our heads, remember? So fixing a sink in exchange for a whiff of pussy is a drop in the bucket. Really. In fact, watch HOW FAST that shit gets done.

Guys you win, because you’ll get laid more, and it only costs you a dollar and some elbow grease each time. And girls you win, too, because you also get laid a lot AND all that shit want done gets done AND you get a cool birthday (or Valentine’s) present to boot!

BOTTOM LINE: EVERYONE WINS — including ME.

How? Because, girls, if HE doesn’t want to do all that shit, just call me, I’ll do it — I’ll even cover the dollar …in most cases.*

—P.

*Subject to approval, some restrictions apply.

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